less house, more home

1. Christopher and Elleanora watching people do impersonations of different celebrities

2. Chicken salad (with lots of carrots, onion and spices) over spinach: main pregnancy craving aka Jameson's main choice of food

3. The window sill in our bedroom // Also, that quote from St. Augustine just gets me.

4. A Spurgeon quote written with my dip pen

5. Another brushlettering doodle :) 

6. A watercolor piece that I picked up at an estate sale a while back; it's my favorite. 

7. Miss E being daddy's girl

8. Miss E giving me some type of instruction 

I don't think I've ever been more content in my life than I am these days. No, I don't have my dream house or my educational goals finished. I haven't gone to South America, Asia or Africa yet, and I most certainly have not mastered any certain skill. I could go on and on about what I don't have yet, and the things I will never have in this lifetime. 

"Less house, more home." It's a saying that has been ringing in my ear for a few months now. 

Less house.... or caring too much about the things in your house.

Things always get it the way, right? No matter how hard we try to place them in the back of our minds, we'll be fighting the battle against greed and comparison the rest of our lives. It's such an exhausting thought, but it's the reality we face. 

We have a small space that we live in. It's lovely and small, and I'm learning to be truly OK with that (especially when I know we have another life joining us soon). A smaller space means less things... it's kind of freeing, really. Less to clean! I do, however, have a tendency to keep wanting to change the things I have. I get tired of pillows, the setup of a room etc... That's when "house" gets in the way of "home" for me. Being too concerned about messes plays into that as well. I'm learning to be ok with messes (even encouraging it sometimes) because I want to remember my children and me enjoying each other. I never want to view my children as hindrances. 

So many times in my life, I have looked forward to the next, big thing. The next adventure, the next move, the next new thing. Looking back, I wasn't truly experiencing the adventure at hand, and I missed out. Motherhood is teaching me that all these little moments I am experiencing with my family are really the biggest things. Living with this perspective is changing everything for me. 

a letter series for my littles//

I'm starting a letter series for my children. I know it's not original, but I always believed this was a powerful idea. My dad wrote me plenty of letters as I grew up, and even though I disregarded his words initially, God used them in a huge way to change my heart. 

These letters will mostly be filled with snippets of stories, truth and wisdom that I have learned...(ALWAYS learning). I am such a broken person, but Christ is making me more whole each day. I know he uses my brokenness everyday to bring his name glory. And I know he will use it to shape the lives of my babies. 

 My Elleanora,

I'm already getting teary eyed before thinking of any words. Maybe it's because I thought I could never have you. Having plenty of health issues, science told me that I couldn't have grow a baby in my tummy. But, the good Lord wanted you on this earth for his delight, and I will be forever honored and blessed to be your mother. I become speechless from time to time when I think about it in its fullness. You bring me endless joy. Having you has given me a tiny glimpse of how God sees His children...and how He must feel when I break His heart.

At 11 months old, you haven't really had the chance to break my heart (maybe when you refuse to cuddle with me), but I know there will come a day when some decisions you make will hurt me deeply.  Ugly moments will happen and prodigal moments will come. Maybe you will have small ones like your daddy or big ones like your mama, but unlike us humans, our God doesn't measure how small or big our wrong deeds are. He has given us all we could ever need, and he's promised us an unconditional love...true love... if we accept it. But sometimes, it just doesn't seem like it's enough.

That's exactly what the world will tell you.

The world will tell you many things you must do in order to be loved and satisfied. What you must achieve, what you need to look like and who you have to listen to. "Your worth," says the world, "is measured by these things." Don't let the lies creep inside your thoughts, my sweet one. Hold onto truth for dear life. Stand strong, and remember... the world's love is always conditional. There is always a heavy price, and the end result is never, ever the result you thought you would get.

You see, every time we search for unconditional love where it cannot be found, we break the heart of the One who's opinion matters most. Every time we use the gifts that he gave us to please the world rather than using them to praise his name, we are doing the exact opposite of what we were put on this earth to do. I don't like to think about it much, but there might be a time when this is what you choose. Just know that your daddy and I are here to help you, guide you and love you in both your brightest and darkest hours. As long as we can.

The truth-filled life is not easy, but I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that it is truly...living. My biggest hope is that you will grasp this sooner than I did.

Love, your mama

"I am loved so much that I am left free to leave home... I have left it and keep on leaving it. but the Father is always looking for me with outstretched arms to receive me back and whisper again in my ear: "Your are my Beloved, on you my favor rests."

-Henry Nowhen (The Return of the Prodigal)

a little nursery tour

The "e" and banner is handmade by our dear friend, Jenny Wilen. When she gave it to me for E's shower, she had no idea what colors we would pick for her future nursery. Couldn't be any more perfect!

Another friend, Connie Bertucci, made this precious blanket for Elleanora. I'm glad she chose white... Jameson can enjoy it too. She made a big person version for Christopher and me as well. 

Love this painting. Found it at Christmas Tree Shops, believe it or not!

We went with giraffes. 

The mobile was handmade my my sweet sister-in-law, Ashley. I love it to pieces. Again... great unisex colors!

Elleanora's pals. 

"Gregory" used to scare the living daylights out of her, but she's grown quite fond of him.

Brainstorming...

I'm not exactly sure what caused this reaction, but she's really cute when she cries.

Love to all!

Jenna

it's a...

Fresh day. Waiting patiently for the big reveal. 

Blueberry oatmeal is her new favorite; it's always one, big purple mess. 

Baby takes her morning nap. I doodle while Christopher makes lattes. Our typical Thursdays (too cold to venture out these days).  

Dr.'s office... they were putting on a show for everyone. I wish you could see the peoples' faces, but it would've been kind of creepy if I pointed my camera at them.

Now, we're antsy.

Or just thirsty...

Onto my parents' house. Still waiting... (my youngest sister)

Momma makes the meatloaf...

Christopher already opened the envelope because he wanted to be the announcer. I was totally ok with that decision. 

We all FLIPPED out. I could only get Elleanora's reaction because everyone else was jumping/screaming/crying. First boy in 51 years (on my side of the family). Wowza!

There he is... Our son: Jameson Clive Flynn

So in love!